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THE COMPLETELY GUILTY BYSTANDER |
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"'He is a strange, half-savage creature of the jungle, Miss Porter'" |
(Lanny: What is Tarzan?) (Alex: Be more specific.) (Lanny: What is Tarzan, the Ape Man?) (Alex: No. Martin?) (Martin: Who is Tarzan of the Jungle?)
Tarzan of the Apes
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"H" is for this 1956 song for which Elvis found "a new place to dwell"--at the top of the charts |
Heartbreak Hotel
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On Oct. 8, 1871 I didn't see her cow start the fire at her Chicago barn, but I should have put it out early |
(Lanny: Who is Mrs. Leary?)
Mrs. O'Leary
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This hemorrhage of a blood vessel leading to the brain is also known as an apoplexy |
a stroke
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In 1875 the first swim across this waterway took about 22 hours; in 1994 it was accomplished in about 7 |
the English Channel
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The chief attendant of the bridegroom |
the best man
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"They reached the carriage-drive at Toad Hall to find, as the badger had anticipated, a shiny new motor-car" |
Wind in the Willows
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"A" is for this Las Vegas hotel where Elvis & Priscilla were married on May 1, 1967, not by a genie but by a judge |
the Aladdin
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I didn't "aid" the thief by giving him directions to the bank, nor did I do this companion act; I didn't incite him to rob it |
abet
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Also known as dens sapientiae, these can be a pain if they have to come out |
the wisdom teeth (or third molars)
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This San Antonio Spurs star originally trained to be an Olympic swimmer, but Hurricane Hugo wrecked the pool |
Tim Duncan
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Proverbial 3-word term for a dog in relation to our species |
man's best friend
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"'Thanks, Ollie.' Those were her last words" |
(Alex: "Love is never having to say you're sorry." [*] was the book.)
Love Story
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"V" is for this 1964 film that used the tagline "Elvis is at the wheel but Ann-Margret drives him wild!" |
Viva Las Vegas
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I was a lookout--I didn't bust open the lock for the "breaking" part or do this crime that goes with it |
entering
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The NFL recently set a policy for these injuries, from the Latin for "shaking" |
concussions
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The wife of this "Give me liberty or give me death" speechmaker was confined at home due to mental illness |
Patrick Henry
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Day-of-the-week term for clothing worn on special occasions |
Sunday best
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"Adam Trask was born on a farm on the outskirts of a little town which was not far from a big town in Connecticut" |
East of Eden
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"T" is for this Mississippi town of Elvis' birth which was once called Gum Pond but later renamed for a tree |
Tupelo
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I did give the guy a crowbar, but I never dreamed he would steal a car & commit this 3-word crime, also a video game |
grand theft auto
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Vegetable term for an ear that's misshapen from repeated blows |
a cauliflower ear
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Horace Gray was the first Supreme Court Justice to hire 1 of these; he spent more time as Gray's barber than researching |
a clerk
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Uno, a 15-inch beagle, took this Westminster Kennel Club top prize in 2008 |
Best in Show
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"Habit, n. A shackle for the free" & "Prejudice, n. A vagrant opinion without visible means of support" |
(Alex: Two entries in [*].)
The Devil's Dictionary
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"P" is for this manager who sold Elvis' entire music catalog to RCA in 1973 for about $5 million, far below its market value |
Colonel (Tom) Parker
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I only introduced this British war secretary to Christine Keeler; I had no idea a scandal would ensue & he'd quit |
John Profumo
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Antonio Egas Moniz won a 1949 Nobel Prize for introducing this procedure that affects the prefrontal lobes |
a lobotomy
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Christianity Today said this animated TV dad is more associated with Christianity than the Pope or Mother Teresa |
Ned Flanders
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Brian Epstein was assigned to boot this drummer from the Beatles in 1962 |
Pete Best
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